Premarital Counseling with Rev. Rebecca
If you knew that an 8-hour commitment would increase your odds of a lasting marriage by 70% would you take it?
When we synthesize all the research data around premarital counseling that is what the statistics seem to tell us. 8 hours of your time at the start of the adventure can mean the difference between arriving on the far shore of your dreams of happiness, or, dashed to pieces in a rocky divorce.
If you think about it like a journey it makes sense that starting out with a good map, a trusty compass, and some the essential tools will increase your chances of getting where you want to go. But most couples simply plunge off in a blind excitement of passion and romance and only realize too late that they’ve forgotten to pack all the most essential supplies for the long journey ahead.
Premarital counseling is like sitting down with a Sherpa before going to climb Mt. Everest – there are some things you’ll want to know before you begin your ascent! Why would you leave something that important to chance? We’re not born with all the skills we need to get us through life – which is why we spend so much time getting educated. Isn’t our personal health, wealth and happiness of equal value to the preparations we give to our professional lives?
In the last analysis, our personal lives count for a lot more than our careers in the tally for how satisfied we are with our lives. Having loving relationships is the single greatest factor in well-being – far more important that the bank account or whether we got the corner office or the Ferrari or the Ph.D.
But somehow we think we “ought to know” how to do love; that it is something so instinctual that to give it actual thought might somehow spoil it. That feeling is coming from your biological instinct to reproduce at any cost – nothing more. But you do not have to be ruled by your mammalian brain. You can bring your higher mind into your relationship and the light will not destroy the beauty and mystery of what you have with each other. In fact, it will give it a firmer foundation.
I offer premarital counseling for all couples - whether or not you are having me officiate your wedding. I am certified in the Prepare-Enrich counseling technique which offers an excellent online questionnaire to help you focus your thoughts and provide important background for discussing your relationship. I have also developed my own 4-part program of a soulful approach to Mindful Marriage Mapping based on my 25 years of work with the ideas of C.G. Jung and the mythologist, Joseph Campbell.
If you are interested in this kind of premarital counseling, please ask for my full description of the process here.
I also offer a less formal style of counseling called spiritual direction, spiritual guidance or soul coaching. This is helpful if you want to focus on your own life path and the issues that are presenting themselves right now.
We can discuss in more depth the types of methods to use during our sessions together, but one of my deep beliefs is that the soul and ego become estranged when the ego refuses to listen to anything but words. Part of my modus operandi in spiritual guidance is to renew our acquaintance with the language of the soul - metaphor. Thus I may introduce poetry, myth, dreamwork, art, mandalas, labyrinths, tarot or soul cards or any number of other avenues that will strengthen the communication between the visible and invisible realms.
I like to spend at least an hour and a quarter, ideally an hour and a half per session. My normal fee is $90 for the session but I do work on a sliding scale and you should feel free to tell me what you feel you can afford. Meeting every other week or once a month keeps the energy high and focused on our work together.
Feel free to get in touch for a free, no-obligation phone conversation.